It's funny because he's fat.
My sister has all of these stupid ‘brain games’ she keeps tricking me with and making me feel dumb as hell. Example: Mika- what color are clouds? Me- white. Mika- what color is paper? Me- white… Mika- what do cows drink? Me- … milk? Mika- NO WATER DUMMY!! Example 2: Mika- spell hop Me- h o p Mika- spell top Me- t o p Mika- what do you do at a green light? Me- stop...
48 hours of nonstop family fun time makes me want to get away. I want to go on an east coast tour and visit my dad’s side of my family. New York. Philadelphia. Atlantic City. Columbia (SC), Atlanta. I just want to go. Somewhere. Anywhere. I need to get out of Iowa for a while.
My sister and her family have only been here 25 hours and it has been GO GO GO the whooooole time. Lathan is playing always. Zyan is constantly getting into everything and anything that isn’t one of his toys. It has just been non stop. Tomorrow we are having a barbecue get-together all day starting at 9am with breakfast. Long story short, I’m ready to go back to work.
but what’s a world without enigma?
So the ex and I made plans to sit down and talk.
The plan was we would meet for a drink and discuss a few things. At 4pm I texted - Hey I’m not doing anything the rest of the night let me know when you are ready. At 5pm I call, no answer. At 6pm I call, no answer. At 6:45pm I text - I’m still available. I can pick you up if you need a ride. Finally at 9pm she texts back and says - UGH CAN’T DO SHIT WITHOUT THESE KIDS ACTING UP...
Haters I ain’t seein’ ‘em. Don’t even believe in...– Wale
I want a beard. Please make this happen as soon as possible. I’ve decided I’m Rick Ross for Halloween. Chop chop! Mario P.S. - I may be Big Meech. Or Larry Hoover. Still undecided.
be-courageousx-deactivated20110 asked: Aww thank you, beautiful :)
I just want you to know you’ll always have a home in my heart yet our relationship was was destined to end from the very start of it we both had our own individual issues you told me a sob story bout how other niggas would diss you baby girl cried so much went through a whole box of tissue while all I could offer was “damn girl I wanna kiss you” now even though I know she had a...
Reblog if you're unattractive, awkward and single.
The Greatest Twitter Account →
(via jimmyphop) “My dad is 81 years old. I’m teaching him how to use the internet. I told him twitter was how to search things on Google. These tweets are what he’s searching.”
I was stupid for letting you in. An idiot for putting my guard down. Everyone warned me about you but I was a fool. I said “Nah, she’d never do any of those things. She isn’t like that anymore.” Boy was I wrong. I always told myself I don’t need a woman or a relationship to be happy. But I actually loved her. Love. I don’t know. Despite all the bad things I...
Dear Oprah -
Just go already. Sincerely, SupaMario
Mom: (To my dad...) "Hey do you know if they make locks for cabinets that don't have knobs, like in the kitchen? You know Zyan's gonna be here getting into everything next week."
Dad: "Yeah they make 'em... But I'ma just keep me a belt and smack his ass every time he get into som'n' he ain't 'posed to. Hell he ol' 'nough now for spankin'... Can't keep babyin' his ass no more..."
Mom: "The boy's not even two!"
Dad: "Once you shit like a grown as man you can get the belt. That boy a grown ass man."
On January 1st I resolved to get my own place, get a full time job (instead of being a contractor), and go back to school. I have done none of the above. Some of it has been laziness. I don’t like filling out applications. All three require that. I don’t have the best credit, and tenants as well as employers check that. I also don’t know what to study, because I still...
Just deleted all of my previous posts on this blog, and unfollowed a few other blogs (sorry, nothing personal). I just need a new beginning. Probably going to delete my Facebook account later today, or at least remove a few ‘friends’ who really aren’t friends at all. So, yeah. Other than job and apartment searching, this is what I’m doing today.